The First Birthday Blues

UGH! It’s inevitable, it’s going to happen, it’s just around the corner…. Jaxson’s FIRST birthday.

I’ve been pushing the thought out of my head for quite some time now. It’s been easy not to think about it when it was 3 or 4 months away. However it is now March. Can you believe it!? I’m not too sure where time has gone, but our little man will be turning ONE WHOLE YEAR old soon.

His birthday comes with so many mixed emotions. Jaxson has been through so much this year. He’s gotten so big and strong. He’s learned so many things. He’s smart. He’s funny. His awesome personality comes out more and more with each day that goes by. I’m so happy with him, with everything he has already accomplished, and with who he’s becoming.

However, each time I hear “man he’s getting big, he’s almost a year old now!” or “what do you have planned for his first birthday? It’s so exciting!”. I become more and more sad. Sad that his first year has literally flown by. Jaxson isn’t our little baby anymore. We will never get that time back and for some reason thats a hard pill for me to swallow.

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I’m sad I’ve had to work this last year and missed out on spending time with him. That being said I’m very happy that Alex got to experience staying home with Jaxson as she probably won’t have the same opportunity with our other children. She has done such an amazing job with Jax, and has surprisingly (because it was not the plan at all) fallen into the ‘stay at home mom’ gigย very easily and comfortably. I have been VERY fortunate to have a stress free, great paying job that allows me to be home every night to tuck my little guy in, snuggle up with my wife on the couch and get a FULL nights sleep every single night (first time in 10 years!). I’m still jealous I missed out on lots of ‘Jaxson time’…. BUT it could be worse!

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No matter how sad I am over this whole first birthday thing. No matter how much I try not to think about it. IT IS GOING TO HAPPEN.ย Instead of fighting it I may as well embrace the birthday and get excited, right?

This week I have filled my days with planning his first birthday. We are going to do a ‘cake smash’ photo shoot, which I am crazy excited for! Our little ungraceful porker is without a doubt going to smash the crap out of a cake. Of course he will preform for the camera as per usual and produce the most astounding cake smashing photos one has ever seen! This morning I purchased his ‘cake smashing outfit’ (oops Alex, I have failed to consult with you, and broke our ‘online purchasing agreement’ we have in place. Here’s your notice, you’ll like this one!). Next week I’ll be working on the backdrop for the photo’s.

We are planning to do a very small party with some family and friends. Not much planning will be needed for that, so I’ll get around to that in a couple weeks.

I know we still have 7 weeks before the big day, but I NEED 7 weeks to get excited and embrace this.ย Not to mention that April will be a write off for us. Between work and a holiday we will need to have all of our first birthday ducks in a row by the end of March.

The final kicker to rev me up for the official big day is we will be having an early birthday celebration with our long lost best friends IN Florida!

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I am so pumped that we are taking a much needed vacay with Ange, Brit, and Jaxson’s future wife Keiana. Sun, pools, relaxing, sand, beach, and even a day at Disney will be an awesome way to celebrate the big ‘one’ early!

So there ya have it. I have fought it long enough…. NOW LET’S GET EXCITED!!!

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